This is something that a lot of my readers can relate to.
First, let me preface by saying that my dating advice for women over 40 is about principles, not rules.
She served as the managing editor of the "Journal of Attention Disorders" and has worked in a variety of research settings. What do you need to know as the partner of a widower?
If he was the primary caretaker, he might have stopped feeling as close to her a long time before the loss. If he’s had therapy and/or he’s self-aware enough to put the past behind him, he’ll be open to loving you.
Or, the opposite—taking care of her might have brought him closer. Alternately, there are widowers who think they’re ready to date and post a profile on a dating site.
Widowed men are prone to jumping into new relationships too quickly, says widower Abel Keogh, in the first chapter of his book "Dating a Widower." Widowers may be seeking companionship, sex or a feeling of normalcy after the death of a spouse -- and will be less discriminating in who they choose to spend time with.
Keogh recommends taking things slow with a widower, especially during the first few months of a relationship.
So, you need to ask him about the quality of his marriage was. You might say something like, “I imagine you had a wonderful marriage”, and see what he says…When you’re a caretaker, it can be one of the most stressful undertakings.